When a Child’s Life is Turbulent Parents Need To Take Solace in Compassion and Understanding

Life can be very hectic in our modern society. There seems to exists a vast plethora of ideas, things and situations in which we should worry about. We use worrying as a means of protecting ourselves from what we’ve come to believe is negative. In reality though; worrying doesn’t help us whatsoever. What little comfort or benefit we gain from it is short lived.

Many times we worry about things that don’t even come into being. For instance; let’s say a parent worries about their children. They think worrying is acceptable and that it’s perfectly natural. In reality though worrying is a fear based behavior and it doesn’t help whatsoever. In fact it is counterproductive to helping others.

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Worrying will only create more of what we don’t want in our lives. When we worry about things; we’re projecting fear based energy; when this fact is coupled with the tenants of the law of attraction we see that our worrying is the reason why we experience more of the things we don’t want. Fear attracts fear; so if we keep being fearful; we’ll keep manifesting and attracting more fears into our life. Like attracts like and remember the saying:

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When parents worry about their children it’s because they don’t want to destroy their sense of duty to their children’s wellbeing. The desire to protect our children is perfectly natural, but what many parents do is that they suppress their children with their attempts to protect them and fail to see they’re doing more damage than good by doing so. Many times parents project their ideas and beliefs onto their children in a attempt to make them the same as them in order to secure their safety and wellbeing.

Many parents don’t know the gifts and talents their children possess because their so focus on protecting their children that they don’t see the magnificent person their child is. They address things from the surface level and never really get the pleasure to understand their child. For instance let’s use an example. Let’s say Billy’s interests, hobbies and work is vastly different from his parents. Billy chooses to start a blog which helps thousands feel better about themselves everyday; but yet no one in his family has ever read a single article. They don’t know all the good that Billy does on this website. His ideas appear to be radical to their way of perceiving reality.

Let’s say that this blog that Billy started doesn’t make him money whatsoever. The parents try encourage Billy to get a full time job, but Billy doesn’t want to do that because he wouldn’t have time to write on his blog. Billy’s parents express disappointment and lack of support because they believe Billy needs a full time job. This creates a schism between Billy and his parents. Billy feels he cannot truly express himself to his parents because whenever he does his parents outright reject his ideas by virtue that it creates a sense of discomfort within them.

This sense of discomfort derives from Cognitive Dissonance which is when you’re confronted with an idea or belief that contrasts your own. They enter into a mild form of fight or flight mode and resist it vehemently. Most people don’t even possess the awareness of this process taking place. They believe it’s a perfectly natural response to what is. They view this belief, situation or idea as being a threat. Thus they conclude that if it is a threat to them; it is a threat to their child as well.

That doesn’t mean Billy’s parents are in the wrong or doing something bad. They just misunderstand Billy’s perspective and beliefs. Billy loves them regardless of them knowing what he does; because love doesn’t place expectations upon others. Love is free and flows with ease. We as guardians should strive to allow children to make their own choices and live life according to their own internal compass without pressure from parents.

What we see nowadays though is parents exerting their beliefs and opinions of life onto their children and if the child resists very little support comes from the parents. They justify this lack of cooperation through many ways; many times using guilt and fear to rationalize it. The Truth is though parents should encourage freedom of choice without pressuring them or making them feel “bad” for choosing to live a life that goes against their own beliefs.

 

Many parents nowadays believe they have it all figured out and that children need to solely learn from them. In reality though; there is no limit to how much we can learn from our children. We see this happen in schools as well; where teachers believe they know it all and if a student shares an idea that goes against what they were taught is the Truth; they will reject it. They don’t even consider it a possibility because they believe their degree makes them right. To be an true leader, a true authority one needs to remember that you never stop learning. There is never a time when we have it all figured out; when you believe you do; that’s when you know you don’t. The Truth is indifferent because it simply is what it is; when teachers reject ideas it’s because their ego is threatened.

Parents do this from a honest intent to help their children; but their misconstrued understanding of freedom has warped their sense of right and wrong. Parents believe their sense of right is the only one valid. They suppress new ideas and anything that they feel conflicts with their sense of continuity. If something comes into their awareness that threatens their sense of what is “right” they resist it.

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We need to allow children to make their own choices; but that doesn’t mean we allow them to come into harms way. If a child is walking on the road and about to get ran over; we run over to the child to get them out of the way. If a child is starting to make decisions and incorporate beliefs that raise concerns we can then talk it through with them. We must do this from a standpoint of not fixing or changing their minds; but instead from the mentality of compassion and understanding. Most of the problems we encounter in life derive from fear. If our child is having difficulties it’s because they are afraid.

Fear can be disarmed with understanding and compassion. Understanding your child is the key in helping heal their fears. When your understand them you’re essentially shedding light upon the darkness. You drive away fear with your willingly to understand and help them feel more connected. Compassion allows them to know that others really do care about them and that helps them open up even more. When you strive to understand your child you can learn so much from them.

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Cultivate an atmosphere of understanding and compassion. Practice listening and remaining indifferent to what is brought into your awareness. Don’t judge what is said and try not to influence them to think otherwise. Guide them with your own understanding of life and what you’ve discovered works for them. Don’t tell them to do anything; let them decide what is right. With a little guidance you can help them discover the answers within themselves. We’re meant to guide our children to their own understanding, not ours.

We can only share our own perspective and opinions on things. We cannot force them to change or control them. Controlling children will not work; it will cause them to rebel even more and slide deeper into darkness and despair. Don’t place any expectations upon them; let them be themselves, even it it goes against what you believe is right. Because the Truth is what is right for you may not be right for them. You never know they may be very successful with what they choose to do.

If something truly is bad for them; you must trust that even if they don’t listen to you at first that eventually they will come to see it as being bad through experience. If you try to control them and attempt to stop it from happening you only delay the inevitable because they will do it regardless of what you do because it’s something that can only be learned through experience. Some things we can guide our children to understand; but other things they will have to learn from experience. This is a fact of life and when we accept this truth we allow our children to empower themselves.

So my beloveds, be loving, open-minded, kind and compassionate to your children. Allow them to simply be who they are. Remain open to who they are and see the magic that has always been within them.

Timothy Frappier

 

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The Power of Forgiveness and Acceptance

The Toxicity of Non-Forgiveness

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In today’s society many view forgiveness as a self-defeating act. Many people wish to hold on to resentments and anger towards others because in their mind they feel it is justified. We attempt to control others by placing expectations upon them, these expectations are desires. We feel these desires/expectations are acceptable and a normal thing to do. When people don’t fulfill our desires we become bitter, upset and spiteful. We use this mechanism as a means to express to others that you’re doing something that hurts me, stop it.

No matter how much you think your anger, bitterness or loathing towards someone is justified, in the end your the one who suffers. We have no right to force others to act in a certain way, we can only be responsible for ourselves, no one else. By holding on to these negative ideas and emotions, you put your well-being in jeopardy. Recent scientific studies have shown that anger can cause depression, anxiety, high blood pressure, stroke and even a heart attack. These negative feelings and belief create imbalances within our emotional world, which then proceeds to breakdown our immune system and body.

The Pain-Body

Eckhart Tolle

Eckhart Tolle sees these negative emotions as being part of our pain-body. He describes the pain-body as this:

The pain-body is my term for the accumulation of old emotional pain that almost all people carry in their energy field. I see it as a semi-autonomous psychic entity. It consists of negative emotions that were not faced, accepted, and then let go in the moment they arose.” – Eckhart Tolle

When we hold onto feelings of bitterness, anger and loathing towards others we suffer greatly. Our pain-body will continue to manifest these painful experiences in our life. We attract that which we resist. The pain-body is a mechanism used to indicate to us that there is something we need to release. The pain-body isn’t negative in the sense it wants to hurt us, it’s negative in the sense because of our free-will we ignorantly choose to dismiss it’s signs and signals, thus continue to hold onto and accumulate more negativity. The pain-body can only persist if we remain stuck in the mind which gives us ample ammunition in the form of judgments to keep us bogged down in negative experiences.

Where There Is Forgiveness and Acceptance, There Is Healing

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The key to healing ourselves and our pain-body is forgiveness and acceptance. These negative emotions cannot exists in a place of forgiveness and acceptance. When we forgive others, its not us releasing the burdens of others, but instead it is the relinquishment of a burden we ourselves have been holding onto.

We are the ones who suffer the most because of non-forgiveness, not others. Many times the people who we choose not to forgive don’t even know you dislike or hate them. They continue on with their life, unaffected by your anger, bitterness and hate. So if your attempt is to punish others by holding onto these negative emotions towards, I have a newsflash for you, it doesn’t work.

Forgiveness opens the doorway to unconditional love, unconditional love has the capacity to heal all the traumas, hurts and pains from our past. The act of forgiveness releases these negative emotions stored in our body and opens them up for unconditional love to take its place. Thus the more we forgive, the more love can be embedded within every fiber of our being. The more love we have within, the more love we shall attract to us. We attract what we believe, think and feel.

The Beauty Of Acceptance

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The act of acceptance is the beautiful dance of embracing what is. By accepting what is we’re able to flow through life in a much more graceful manner. When we resist acceptance, we’re going against the stream of life and struggle to move each moment. Acceptance is the key to properly handle the poisonous habit of forming desires. The only desire we should have is to be our real authentic self. If we hold onto desires that are external of us, it will result in suffering.

Accepting the fact that we are responsible for ourselves and no body else allows us to attain a state of sovereignty. The focus becomes on oneself, because in the end our individual reality is formed by us. The external world is an reflection of our inner world. What is in is out and what is out is in. Everything that we experience is of our doing, so when someone annoys, angers, frustrates or irritates us, it is our own doing. The moment we accept these feelings as being our own creation, the easier it is to release them.

Claiming responsibility of one’s life allows acceptance to flow naturally. By accepting others as they are and not what we expect them to be, releases the burden of carrying the baggage that is not ours to keep. We cannot control others and the sooner we come to this understanding, the better off we’ll be. Forgiveness can be considered an attribute of acceptance, with acceptance we see that forgiving others is an act of accepting them for who they are. Thus acceptance supplements the act of forgiveness by allowing us to ride the currents of life through the heart of what is. Because everything is what it is, embrace what is, be what is and know that forgiveness is what is.

Practicing acceptance is quite easy. When you feel negative emotions or start judging others, take a moment to pause. Observe the thoughts, sensations and feelings. Accept them as they are and attach no emotional judgment towards them. When we find the courage within ourselves to accept these emotions as what is, we make it easier to release them. When they’re released, think for a moment what belief or idea may have caused it, then explore that idea and observe what feelings and sensations arise. Accept those feelings & sensations and place no judgment upon them. This is the best way to practice acceptance, by doing this you release many burdens and bring peace into the forefront of your life. Keep practicing this until you feel you should stop, trust yourself and what you find, when doubt arises explore it and see what you find.

In Closing

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Acceptance and forgiveness is the key to a happier life. Acceptance is a state of being that embraces what is. By embracing the moment for what it is we bring peace, serenity and unconditional love upon this planet. We assist others by not casting judgments or placing unwarranted expectations upon them. By accepting others as they are, we bring harmony and unconditional love into our circle of influence. Therefore bringing the liberation of Earth closer into realization within the Eternal Now. Be consumed by the beautiful embrace of what is and forever be that which will always exist.

By: Timothy Frappier

 

 

 

 

 

Open letter to the Breakaway Civilization Leaders – the once in a lifetime Opportunity of integrating our societies

 

Whoever has the proper channels to make this message arrive its intended destination, Mankind wishes that you make that happen.

TO: Leaders of the Breakaway Civilizations

With respect,

We’re writing this message to you with a vision. We, the surface humans that are aware of your existence, recognize and embrace the potential that lies in a future conciliation of our current displaced societies.

We acknowledge hereafter that the current rift that lies between us is obviously sand in the wheel  of our evolution, slowing down the quantum leap that we should have done long ago.

What happens is that one way or another, our current relation is one based on distrust and unleveled playing fields, which is based on the supposed ignorance by the masses of our planet of your existence, your stealth appropriation and use of assets and our workforce, which of course you depend less and less in face of your thousands of years ahead technological rift.

However we, the aware Humans, recognize that this current state of affairs is aberrant in the Galactic Context, which is openly based on balanced and honest relations between extremely leveled civilizations, despite all the differences of context and origins.

This proves to bring unlimited prosperity. Even on Earth the few experiments that worked out, where society was transparent and leveled proved to bring well being to most of the population in those “experiments”.

We must understand that a “separate” civilization that takes advantage upon other is doomed to fail sooner or later because that’s not the “standard” in the Universe. It’s an anomaly.

We also know that anomalies sooner rather than later are deemed to be “fixed”, either naturally or unnaturally, being the current situation on this solar system a blending of both we believe.

The point here is: the way things are now we have absolutely no chance of integrating with the greater Galactic Community. Neither will they accept a civilization who lives at the expense of another, neither will they accept ours with our current limited understanding and primitive behavior (collectively of course because there are a lot of “exceptions” out there, on both sides).

Should we remind you that, despite your great technological advancement you’re pretty much confined to this solar system, and you’re seen with distrust by other peaceful civilizations, which is limiting your ability to explore the cosmos and reach a broader understanding and knowledge. You also may live under constant siege since you spent your whole life fighting, on guard and preparing to defend from something which you probably came to realize it wasn’t quite as you been told.

Moreover living for so long at our expense and taking advantage of the manufactured ignorance of the population on this planet, may have developed in you a sense of superiority and the thought of “you really don’t have anything we need, we have everything provided to us”.

But here’s an outrageous idea: we may have many things to offer beside blood and sweat which has been the norm so far.

You may feel a certain degree of “freedom” inside the works of your society but please consider what you’re about to read.

It’s true Human societies have been enslaved and intellectually and spiritually strangled. It’s true we collectively are fragmented, generally ignorant of our true nature and driven in our daily lifes by things you may see as “meaningless” through your eyes.

It’s partially true but, because you really don’t live among us, you also can’t really see all the other things that make our society, which was poorly treated by so many other species along the ages, also beautiful and interesting.

You may also fail to see the things that you could gain in living “with us” instead of living “from us”.

This change in perspective is necessary to torn down the wall which is keeping us in bondage instead of creating bonds.

The change in perspective has the potential to drive both of our societies into an endless stream of prosperity, mutual beneficial  trade, fulfilling lifes and jobs, fertile and pleasure social relations and general wellbeing for all.

You probably believe that all of this is wishful thinking, or maybe that the rift is just too big. Maybe you even think that we don’t have what it takes and we give importance to things apparently irrelevant to you.

But MAYBE just because we, as Humans living on the surface, despite all the attempts to grind us down, STILL have a glimpse of the most beautiful things in the Universe, we are the ideal partnership for you.

And MAYBE, just MAYBE, because you have access to knowledge and technologies that could heal us and the planet faster than the eye can see, and many of you are still nevertheless Humans bond to us by your history and genetics,  you’re the ideal partner for us.

See where I’m getting at?

Of course, for this partnership to work it should be preceded by your own disclosure.

You’re probably afraid that we’re too “primitive” to understand the context you’ve been living under and that we’ll be incapable of forgiving once the truth comes out.

I can’t speak for all Humans. But what I can say is that, under “normal” circumstances, if interferences and trauma based behavior are removed, most Humans tend to forgive and live their life’s focusing on theirs and others wellbeing, personal development and spiritual evolution.

You see, we have better things to do than witch hunts. But that doesn’t mean we don’t we want people to take responsibility for their actions.

However most of the Aware and Conscious Humans, at present, do not conceive the idea of keeping a person behind bars for the rest of its life.  We Conscious Humans believe more in repentance than punishment. Punishment is a concept of a control system that was forced upon us.

We also believe that it’s possible to heal the deepest of rifts between people. We have examples of that. We, the regular Humans, do that all the time, despite what our pretentious and supposed “rulers” told you so.

If you come out in the open, recognizing your actions and help us to create a truly abundant system for all, think of the possibilities.

See how this could change both of our lives.

You’re probably thinking that we’re suggesting converting your civilizations into one of tourist guides and stewards for Humans to have a glimpse of cosmos and our true history.

We’re not going to lie about that and probably most of us would like to do that someday. And we shouldn’t forget about the cities below the surface of our planet which have much to teach us too.

But to focus solely on that is very narrow minded.

The truth is that an almost unlimited range of opportunities could come from that “joint venture”.

It’s not just “tourism”. Think in the range of knowledge transfer and all the services related that could transform the very essence of our societies. We’ll have to radically change our Education systems, Healthcare, Economy, social structure and pretty much almost everything.

IF we are able to create a true abundant economic system which provides for all, the fact is that you’ll get 7 billion people eager to learn and to expand their understanding. You’ll get 7 billion potentially new FRIENDS, and maybe who knows even an excellent business partner.

Think about it. A new economic paradigm on Earth, along with full Disclosure, properly handled of course, will offer you the once in a lifetime opportunity to reconvert your societies from “police & patrol” to eternally defend yourself against bogus enemies, to one of pure leisure, knowledge seeking and individual prosperity.

Trade among us would certainly be prosperous and mutually beneficial.

This is also an invitation.

So if you believe we have nothing to offer, think twice.

We, despite our current limitations are able to live through life seeking the ultimate goal of doing whatever makes us feel better, whatever brings about the feeling of being connected to others and everything.

This we know. This is why we prevail and will prevail. Our experience can be most valuable and we certainly will put it to use.

Here are some of the things we Humans do have more or less throughout all our cultures, in different degrees, and you may wish to experience someday:

  • feel free to go everywhere without fearing for your life or having to pretend to be something your’re not
  • Having a “Home”
  • Having a safe harbor where you can just relax and get along with everybody
  • Leave in peace
  • Moments of just “being” yourself without judgment, known as “Joy”
  • Connect to other beings who like to be with you for what you are and accept you unconditionally
  • Having a “good time” (more on that can be explained later)
  • Take some time off and away from everything. A “vacation” or a “weekend” perhaps?
  • To have a family. Children. A dog. A small garden. A home that you can call your own.
  • Invite your friends for dinner.
  • A birthday party.
  • Watch a theatre play or a concert in the park in the Spring time.
  • Fell in love by someone you’ve just met under the most unlikely circumstances
  • See your son for the first time after his birth
  • A walk in a most beautiful landscape without the fear of never being able to return there
  • Seeing the sunset knowing you’ll be there next day to see it rise again, probably with the person you fell in love in the most unlikely circumstances

This and so much more can be yours also.

Quoting a very famous Earth made movie, “this could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship”.

This could be a new beginning for all of us.